Ogling

Okay, so i really thought that I wasn't going to update until after my Capstone was done, but I found myself with twenty minutes before Preston and Stephanie's senior show, so I thought that I'd give you something brief to think about.

Starting this past Thursday (the day of Edgar's Ashes), it has been warm in Rome. And by that, I mean Southern warm. Think the upper 80's and lower 90's. My friend Liz from Minnesota has come on record to say the weather is "ungodly" and "awful." She gives it two stars for experimenting but for the experiment falling flat.

Regardless, I deal with the weather as best I can--I throw on khaki cargo shorts, a solid t-shirt, and I finally clean out the pockets of my jackets where my keys, wallet, and phone have resided since mid-October when the air first dropped to 60. I spend as little time outside because my skin has the pale, luminescent glow of a vampire (think a for-real vampire, not a Rice or, even worse, Twilight). So, I dash between buildings and tan by the light of a computer screen as I desperately pound out the last four papers of my undergrad career.

But, in my dashing, I have noticed something: the heat has made Shorter clothing optional. Not full on European-nudist beach, but certainly a good old American beach. Like, a few days ago, I was walking through the front circle, and people were playing Frisbee, everyone shirtless and at least semi-attractive. Now, it would be one thing to do this on a practice field or in front of a dorm, but this is the main lawn of the college. And there have been a lot of tours lately. And I'm not a prude, by any stretch. Here's my problem:

If you're going to strut around without a shirt on, I'm going to stare at you. Especially if you're attractive. If you don't have a good face, then I'll look at your above average chest. I'm not going to perv out on you, but I appreciate beauty. And sometimes, I'm simply over inner beauty. I just want to stare at something hot. Which isn't a problem--I embrace the fact that everyone exists on multiple levels and one of them (that I love, at least) is physical.

Let me put it this way: for once, I'm glad Shorter has so many athletes.

My problem is that good ol' Shorter is conservative as hell. And if I stare too long, I'm going to get harassed. Or hit. So, I can't enjoy the scenery because I don't enjoy the write kind of scenery because I want the bitches with the huge tits in the tiny bikinis to get out of the way so I can look at the guy who's hitting on them.

And that just seems like a tragedy. So, I do the good ol' soft focus business and try not to relive a Lifetime horror story. Because honestly, the weather's too beautiful to bleed or spend it in an ER.